Time was, when I was rather good at organising my days. As a teenager fresh out of school, I had four simultaneous part-time jobs for a while. Later, I ran large multi-national retail chain stores with some success. Yet, nothing has challenged my abilities more than trying to organise my life around my current No. 1 profession, that of a single mama, juggling a new work-from-home freelance writing/blogging business with an external university degree.
Now, I hope your personal brand of insanity is a little kinder than mine but, whichever way you look at it, we women are rather good at taking on a lot and expecting ever more from ourselves.
I recently read a wonderful blog post debating the wisdom of the trend to multi-tasking, claiming, quite rightly, that it is impossible to do one thing well when you are thinking of other things at the same time, and I whole-heartedly agree.
Still, the reality for most single mothers is the constant need to juggle your responsibilities as a parent with your responsibilities as a business person or employee, often on a moment-by-moment basis. How do you do this, and retain your sanity, without hunting around in your attic for an old brass lamp (or a time machine)?
Here's a few of my new favourite time-management tools, that I am using in my life until that genie arrives:
The To-Do List. Most people claim they are either a list-maker or NOT a list-maker, but I think creating a short list of daily priorities is a learned skill, and an essential for the organised single mother.
The trick is that word, “priorities”; keep it short and put the 3-5 most essential things on top. If you must scare yourself and write it all down (and I confess that my current must-write list is almost as long as an article itself), then make sure you number them in priority order, and set yourself a small number per day to complete. Creating the To-Do list habit/addiction is all about the reward of ticking completed tasks off.
The Whiteboard. I'm a writer - I have calendars, notebooks and a very handy Home & Work Diary/Planner/Journal to manage all my activities. However, with article and blog post deadlines, uni assignments and the boyo's school activities and special days (Show and Share, Library Bus day, Assembly) to remember too, I've found the at-a-glance beauty of my new whiteboard means that the visual side of my brain and memory can quickly see and prioritise what I should do next when I am at a loose end.
The Back-Up Team. You'll hear a lot from me on the need for every single mama to have a good back-up team; by which I mean, people whom you can rely on to take on a care role with your children from time to time, when you need to get through some additional tasks, clear a backlog or meet with a client.
You may be lucky enough to have helpful family members nearby, or you may need to learn to build your tribe from scratch, remembering that the key is make the relationship reciprocal – each should benefit the other. Use the gift of the back-up team wisely – exchange play-dates with a friend when you have a high-priority task to knock over, and allow them the same freedom another time.
Personal Kindness. Where does this sit in a post about time-management? This tip can also be read as “give yourself a break”.
Slugging through a list of tasks is not always the best thing a single mama can do for herself. Sometimes, it's time to push away from the desk or phone, pull out the face-paints and transform your little monsters into their inner selves. Play, relax, have a bubble bath after they go to sleep.
The work will still be there when you get back, but your ability to focus and make those satisfying ticks will be renewed. Remember why you are doing this, and for whom, and make sure you are remembering to put them, and you, first.
Having put a big tick on my list next to this post, I'm off to transform my little man into a superhero. It's hard work, but someone's got to do it. ;
Tags: Work At Home Single Mother Single Mama Parenting Business
